The first time I got glasses, I didn't think I needed them; I just thought it was gettin' REAL smoggy in Toronto and that's why I had trouble reading street signs a block away, or the number on an oncoming bus. Turns out I needed glasses for distance and once I got them, it was a WHOLE NEW WORLD, From Anna-style.
When it came to picking my glasses, however, I inexplicably chose these red wire frame ones, which were...fine, I guess?
I wore these "homage to Sally Jessy Raphael" frames for at least seven years before upgrading to my current frames, seen here while I try to show off my cute hair and distract from my receding hairline (a post for another day).
I also have a pair of glasses with "transitions" lenses that make me look like a '70s pedophile, so unfortunately, there are no photos of those (although I do still wear them to walk the dog on sunny days and I do still get 'OMG IS THAT A 1970s PEDOPHILE?' looks from people on the street).
I've worn my current frames since 2011 and a couple of years ago, the last time I went in to get my eyes checked, the optometrist suggested that I might need bifocals.
"Your current glasses are fine for distance but you might find that you need an adjustment to, say, look at your phone with your glasses," she said.
"Nah," I said, easily reading a text on my phone at the time, "I'm good. Not time for bifocals yet, GRANDMA."
Probably about a year later, I met up with my theatre school pals Gicl and Elca for sushi and when I was looking at the menu, Gicl caught me doing that thing where you hold the menu REAL far away from your face because you fuckin' need bifocals.
"Did you just do THIS??" Gicl said, imitating me with great gusto.
The decline had begun.
Of course, it took me WAAAAY longer than it should to get around to getting new glasses but yesterday, Katr and I went to the eye doctor and I got to try on ALL THE FRAMES.
I only tried on eight pairs and two of them might be the same, so I added in the dog.
I feel like the cutest picture of me does not contain the actual glasses I chose and I considered waiting until I got the glasses for a REVEAL post that only my mom would care about, but we may not get our new glasses until December and I didn't want you to wait until next November to see them, so I will let you know now - I chose the ones on the bottom right.
They are waaaay bigger than my current glasses AND they will contain Progressive lenses so that I can live the ultimate dream; watching TV and scrolling through Twitter AT THE SAME TIME.
As a side note, it was my first time seeing Katr's optometrist and she was lovely. My favourite moment was when she was doing the thing where you're looking at the letters and she's swapping out the lenses to see which are better or worse and at the end, she goes "Good job! You're such a good observer!" and I am 44 but I still glowed with praise.
Later, I told Katr about it and she burst out laughing. "She said the same thing to me! And it FELT SO GOOD." Anyways, thanks Dr. Chow, for making us feel special. I can't wait for my giant old lady glasses!
