"Oh shit," I thought to myself, as I stood in the kitchen in my yoga pants, unironically blending a green smoothie with kale I picked up at the Main and Terminal Farmer's Market from our Community Supported Agriculture shares, which were grown in the parking lot next to Rogers Arena. "It's happened. I've become a Vancouver douchebag."
I think you all saw it coming before I did. First, there was the gluten-free situation. Then, we became urban gardeners. Last year, we started doing the yoga. But I didn't really feel that I'd succumbed completely to VD until last week, when:
a) I made that smoothie; and
b) I ran errands in public wearing yoga capri pants even though I didn't have my dog with me and actual yoga was not imminent.
I HAVE NOW BECOME EVERYTHING THAT I HATE.