Katr loves wine. She doesn’t drink it out of a box, though - she is what you would call a connoisseur. She keeps labels. She ages things in a special wine fridge. She uses words like “mouthfeel” and “sediment” without irony. It’s really quite a turn-on. When I tell others about Katr’s avid interest in wine, they’ll say “So, she’s like that guy in Sideways!", and I usually just nod instead of explaining that I didn’t bother to see that film, as it combined two things I don’t care for: wine appreciation and, as Padu described it, the “glorification of the pathetic male". Although I DO like that Sandra Oh.
Before I met Katr, everything I knew about wine I’d learned from reading mocking commentary about The Bachelor’s Andrew Firestone on Television Without Pity. I’d sniff a good orange juice and pronounce it “woody". I’d been known to comment on the “nice legs” of a vintage Diet Pepsi. Initially, Katr’s love of wine was not shared by me and my infantile palate ("Oh my god! When you put the wieners WITH the beans, it’s, like, taste SENSATION!"), but I am beginning to appreciate the subtleties of wine, mainly how it goes good with meat. And sometimes, chocolate cake.
In light of my more adult interest in wine, Katr and I decided to check out an LCBO Wine and Chocolate Tasting last week up at Summerhill. Ray Perchaluk, LCBO Product Consultant and Sue Degrandis from Chocolates by Bernard Callebaut guided us through a little history lesson about chocolate (I had to restrain myself from exclaiming “kah KOW, kah KOW!!” whenever Sue referred to “cacao” tree) and then we tasted some wine and some chocolates. TOGETHER.
Update: Speaking of chocolate, I had included a photo of Bernard Callebaut’s “Thanksgiving Horn” from their site, which has since (since THIS MORNING) disappeared. So, for those of you who checked in early and saw the picture, mazel tov. What I said about it was that they make some INCREDIBLE chocolate but I feel like they need to work a little more on presentation. This “cornucopia of chocolate” thing looks like something your friends send you when you break up with your girlfriend - you know, the old “chocolate dildo full of chocolates” gift. With a little chocolate turkey on the side and some squash that look like boobs. But I digress.
The LCBO gives you handouts at this thing, so that you could take notes on the combinations you liked or the wines you enjoyed (for purchase later on). True to form, I used MY handouts to make ridiculous notes that are of absolutely no use to anyone, including me. Fortunately, Katr took some ACTUAL notes and they’re wonderful - check them out.
Here are mine:
Jackson-Triggs Okanagan Sauvignon Blanc
with a Mint and Milk Chocolate Ganache:
It melds together - like our love.
Ontario Malivoire Gewurztraminer 2004
with a Cinnamon Nutmeg Ginger Ganache:
It makes me cinnamon’s bitch.
Australian Yellow Tail Reserve Shiraz 2003
with Leaf (Milk Chocolate Ganache with Blackcurrant):
Not for Katr, but nice legs. Without the chocolate, it tastes like hot buttered ass.
Luigi Righetti Capitel De Roari 2000 Amarone
with Expresso Truffle with Ganache Filling:
Noses horse fluffies. But chocolate is so good I want to rub it in private areas.
Williams & Humbert Dry Sack Sherry (Spain)
with Celeste Truffle with Plain Dark Ganache:
Heh heh. Dry sack. Mincemeat flavours, nutty, caramel. My mouth is on fire like the California hills - save me, chocolate!
Southbrook Farms Framboise (NV)
with Marionberry Creme Fraiche:
I need a private moment with this one. If this glass wasn’t so narrow, I would lick it out.
So, my note-taking technique needs work. Thank god Katr was there to actually write down things that were useful. Next time we do something like this, I’m going to try harder to take actual notes. But if it’s a wine and cheese tasting, I promise you that at least one of my notes will read “Tastes like feet. With the wine - wet feet. But woody. And nice legs.”
Comments:
I wish to attend a chocolate and cheese tasting. Please do what you can to make that happen for me.
Comment by Melissa — Wednesday, October 5, 2005 @ 3:11 pm
Melissa - DVR for me - chocolate and cheese tasting for you. I hope we understand each other.
Comment by Rose — Wednesday, October 5, 2005 @ 3:14 pm
I liked your notes–they were funny! Of course I’m not a wine connoisseur so my opinions probably not worth much on this one.
Comment by Leo — Wednesday, October 5, 2005 @ 6:00 pm
Indeed, young lady, we do.
Comment by Melissa — Wednesday, October 5, 2005 @ 10:01 pm
See I like the Shiraz but then I like that hot buttered ass taste. I agree with you about Sandra Oh. Definitely something about her that trips my trigger.
Comment by Drew — Thursday, October 6, 2005 @ 1:48 am
Drew, I . . . think I just threw up a little.
Comment by Rose — Thursday, October 6, 2005 @ 2:19 am
There’s this one hilarious naked running scene that I found particularly enjoyable in Sideways. I also thought the naked running scene in Old School was funny. I just think naked running is comedy. More importantly, however, Sandra Oh is a magical being. With magical hair. And she looks totally kickass on a motorcycle.
I’m no good with the “tasting” part of the wine-tasting experience. I like the drinking part of the wine-drinking experience though.
Comment by Chezza — Thursday, October 6, 2005 @ 3:02 pm