Creampuff is . . . Unwell

Oh my god, you guys. I am sick as a

I didn't want to believe it. At first, I was simply feeling a little dull and uninspired. Then I was a little scratchy throated and had a headache. I hit the ColdFX and hit it hard. I bought some anticipatory Dayquil - you know, just in case things went south. They did. They went south like an eager lover. I am now out of Dayquil. I just spent the last half hour lying on the bed thinking up country song titles that describe how I'm feeling.

I Feel Like Ten Kinds of Ass

If Only I Could Find The Cat That Shat In My Mouth

Thank the Good Lord for the Sweet Sweet Ice Maker in Our Fridge

Jesus, Take the Wheel and Head to the Drugstore For Me

If I Bring That Up One More Time We'll Have to Vote on It

I Feel Like Twelve Kinds of Ass, 'Cause I Thought of Two More

Oh Chicken Soup, I Wish I Could Taste You Tonight

My Woman Up and Left, Was It My Ricola Breath?

It's true - young Katr left this afternoon for a week-long biznass trip. On the one hand, I miss her tender love. On the other hand, we're not gay married yet and do I really want to let her know the extent of my potential for horkaciousness before we tie the knot? I don't think so either.

I hope you all have wonderful disease-free weekends. And I mean that. Me, I'm looking forward to some fine whine and possibly some easy knitting. Although on second thought, maybe just the whining. One more harsh sneeze while holding knitting needles and I might put out my eye.

**UPDATE** I can't believe I forgot to include "Noseminer's Daughter". Damn.