Creampuff Does Some Monday Fish Blogging

Okay.  I've had the same Ben Harper song on repeat all ding dong day and I think it's time I took a break and did some Monday fish blogging.

If I had cute and/or self-loving cats like Winter and New York Ex, I would gladly join the Friday cat blogging movement.  But Katr and I have fish and we all know that cats and fish get along like me and Janeane Garofalo.  Cats (me) LOVE fish (Janeane), maybe a little TOO much.  Fish fear cats, and with good reason. (Pssst, Janeane - call me!)

We recently moved our two gigantic goldfish from a much-too-small tank to this palatial, 20 gallon hexagonal tank.  Note the classy ruins and bubbling pagoda; we do not discriminate against kitsch from any nation.  Once again, however, Katr vetoed my request to have a saxophone-playing skeleton as the bubble element.

Me:  But you LOVE jazz!

Katr:  No.

Me:  We could call him "Bones"!

Katr: NO.

I grudgingly admit that she was probably right.  These fish sure seem to love that pagoda.  I have yet to see them do a scene from Antigone near the Greek ruins but I swear I caught them in front of the pagoda performing a series of tableaux vivants from Intrigues in the Qing Imperial Court.  This is a vast improvement over their former pastimes in the small tank, which were basically: 

• Waiting for me to feed them;
• Eating;
• Diligently sucking on all the rocks for any food they might have missed; and
• Attempting to eat anything else floating around in the tank, including the products of digestion.

Sparkle (the lithe, bigger fish) and Oscar (the pudgy, waggly fish) are cute and sometimes, like right now, they kiss!  But they are not what you would call "learning robots" and I must say, their attempted crap-eating shenanigans provided endless entertainment.  You could actually see the single gear turning in their little fish heads over and over again: "Heeeeey! Food!  Right on!  I'm gonna snag a little bite of THIS yumminess and aaaaaaa!  AAAAAAAAAH!!  Ptui! Ptui!  I ate crap!  I ate crahahahahaaaaaap!  EWWWWwww . . . GOD, that was so disGUS - heeey!  Food! FanTAStic!  Let me just sidle up to this delicious morsel and AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Ah, silly, crap-eating fish.  Good times. 

You know when you're having nostalgia for those crap-eating fish times, you've been listening to Ben Harper for a little too long.  Clearly, it's time for Shawn Colvin.

Comments

[Chris Nolan.ca]

My father in law has a bunch of aqauriums. Check out his site @ http://brifli.ca/ for some seahorses and other things.

[roro]

Ooo, hot tip! Thanks, Chris!

[Heather]

Hilarious! I always imagined when I was a kid my little goldfish's inner monologue went something like "Oh look! A castle! Oh look! A diver man! Oh look! A castle."

I even performed it as a kid, pretending to be a fish (sad, I know), but yours is WAY funnier.

[newyorkex]

Tell the fish to stop kissing and check out the new Zoey photos!

[Syd]

Okay, if I send you something, would you put it in the tank and take a picture of it??

I think you have the makings of a theme or a contest here. Wait. How mean is your GF?

[roro]

Heather - that is AWESOME. Anyone pretending to be a fish is hilarious to me.

NYEx - those pictures. Dirty.

Syd - you are effing brilliant! What a great idea! Unfortunately, my gf spent her formative years in Texas; she's not mean, but she's a great shot. And, as she said to me earlier, "I like a little junk in the trunk - not in the tank." I'll try and wear her down.

[Syd]

Well, you enjoy that wearing down process. I will be narrowing down my choice, just in case, from http://www.catholicshopper.com/products/inspirational_sport_statues.html

[roro]

HA ha! Syd, Catholic Shopper KILLS me. I think Jesus helping the whitest kids in White-onia play baseball would be a welcome addition to the tank.