So we went to Niagara Falls to see Spirit of the West in concert for St. Patrick’s Day - as you do. We stayed over at a fine hotel with a view of the falls, the evening was hosted by the angry Scotsman with the giant sideburns from the Alexander Keiths commercials and the band was KICKIN’. Literally, which is impressive! Aren’t they, like, 50?
Also, knowing of my fondness for the brilliant music and lyrics, Erar, Sahi, Rela and Subr got together for my birthday this year and hooked me up with tickets to Bat Boy, which, sadly, closed a month early this past weekend due to shitty reviews and poor attendance. Having seen the show and enjoyed it IMMENSELY from fantastic front row seats ("Sink your fangs into my soul - only you can make me whole! Hoooooooooooooooold me, Bat Boy!") I must reiterate (or “iterate", I suppose, as I have not previously discussed it here) that some (read: most) of the theatre critics in this town are humourless, self-important shitheads whose only joy in life is their deep hatred of theatre.
Anyway - as there are few things more revealing than a comparative analysis, here is mine:
Spirit of the West at the Fallsview Casino vs. Bat Boy at the Bathurst St. Theatre
SOTW: Beverage of choice: beer.
BB: Beverage of choice: blood.
SOTW: Opening act was the Celtic Tenors. You haven’t LIVED until you’re at a ballroom at a casino, wearing green foam moose antlers, drinking a pint and listening to Pavarotti and pals singing “Whiskey in the Jar".
BB: No opening act, but killer opening SONG. “Hear the cry that no one hears! Come and lick away my tears! Hold me, Bat Boy!!”
SOTW: No creampuffs on stage.
BB: One very talented creampuff.
SOTW: More tits!
BB: More fangs!
SOTW: Shitty song about “July” that sounded nauseatingly like “Love is All Around” by Wet Wet Wet.
BB: Hilarious song about Garden of Eden style inter-species mating, which featured copulating stuffed animals and much enthusiastic licking of a stuffed beaver.
SOTW: Ended with two encores and subsequent gambling. YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!
BB: Ended with three deaths and many hard lessons learned. About acceptance and love. And how scary hicks are.
Suffice to say that both shows were excellent. What an exceptional start to the weekend. And that was just Thursday and Friday!
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s entry, a comparative analysis of Blue Planet, the children’s show that just closed at the Lorraine Kimsa Theatre for Young People (in which friend Padu rocked the Casbah as a cute, flying child) vs. A Suicide-Site Guide to the City, which just closed at Buddies (in which Darren O’Donnell played himself). A sample:
SSGTTC: “Chickenshit ass-fuckers".
BP: “The butterflies only come out once a year on a very special day!”
